Max Bygraves – Fings Ain’t Wot They Used To Be Chords

They’ve changed our local Palais into a bowling alley
and fings ain’t what they used to be

There’s teds with drainpipe trousers and debs in coffee houses
and fings ain’t what they used to be

There used to be trams not very quick got ya from place to place
But now there’s just jams half a mile thick
stay in the human race I’m walking

They stuck parking meters outside our doors to greet us
now fings ain’t what they used to be

Cor, monkeys flying ’round the moon
we’ll be up there with ’em soon
fings ain’t what they used to be

Once our beer was frothy but now it’s frothy coffee
well, fings ain’t what they used to be

It used to be fun Dad and old Mum paddling down Southend
But now it ain’t done never mind, chum
Paris is where we spend our outings

Grandma tries to shock us all doing a knees up rock ‘n’ roll
fings ain’t what they used to be

We used to ‘ave stars singers who sung a dixie melody
They’re buying guit ars plinkety plonk
backing themselves with three chords only

Once we’d dance from twelve to three I’ve got news for Elvis P
fings ain’t what they used to, There’s a lot, we used to
fings ain’t what they used to be